There’s a warning sign on the Internet that reads: “Please don’t feed the trolls.” So I’m really, really sorry about what I’m going to write. There are no trolls like Apple trolls. None. And yet here I am, about to toss a huge bag of peanuts into their cage. Sorry. I recently bought an iPhone for the first time. I finally gave in to the hype. I heard so many bug-eyed fanatics say they were the best thing since the wheel was invented. (Maybe even better, because how many wheels have Snapchat, huh?) After all, 50 million hipsters can’t be wrong. Right? And I was excited. Oh, boy, was I excited. At last I was joining the fun. At last I was joining the party. I was going to have an iPhone like...
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